Category: Uncategorized

MURDER OR SUICIDE!

cropped-fotoflexer_photo9.jpg

On a cold grey February morning there’s nothing like a good belly laugh to get you going! Still second largest shareholder in the moribund parent body – the G.M.S.T. is now a rotting corpse.

MURDER OR SUICIDE?

FotoFlexer_Photo

Soon to be serialised – the complex web of intrigue and deceit leading to the sad passing of the Greenock Morton Supporters Trust, but there’s the small matter of a twisted wee dick  to be disposed of firstly!

download.jpg

Screenshot_3

giphy

MORE SOON FOLKS!

AN EVIL HOAX!

cropped-fotoflexer_photo2.jpg

Seems that ROUSSELLE VAN BUMSHAFTEN’s ‘rocket penis’ was an evil hoax, and that the poor soul is in fact scheduled for amputation and strapadictomy. All at the Monkey House send good pre-operative wishes!

Sex toy strapon for role play. Doodle style

That’ll be the end of the twisted wee dick and it’s put a big smile on PORKY PAUL’S face!

fotoflexer_photo61

MORE SOON FOLKS!

happy happiness GIF

 

 

ROUSSELLE VAN BUMSHAFTEN -LATEST!

download (1)

Despite warnings about a high risk of rejection, ROUSSELLE VAN BUMSHAFTEN has opted for a brand new ‘Rocket Penis’, thereby confirming his longstanding trust in the medical profession.

Once again, PORKY PAUL JOHNSTONE is ‘over the moon’, and after amputation, the twisted wee dick will take pride of place in the Morton Hall of Fame beside Douglas Rae and other pricks.

FotoFlexer_Photo

Exclusive pictures coming soon folks along with a preview of Kiltie’s hattrick against the Arabs!

giphy

 

 

DECISION DAY!

ROUSSELLE VAN BUMSHAFTEN has until midnight on Thursday to decide on the future of his corkscrew penis.

HE HAS BEEN BEEN OFFERED THE FOLLOWING OPTIONS:

1/ MAINTAIN THE STATUS QUO.

FotoFlexer_Photo

2/ AMPUTATION WITH GRAFTING ON OF NEW ROCKET PENIS (HIGH RISK OF REJECTION).

3/ AMPUTATION AND CREATION OF A PROSTHETIC VULVA AND VAGINA (FAKE FANNY).

download (1)

Mortonjag and the Monkey will update their readers as details emerge!

impressiveunfitflatfish-size_restricted

BREAKING NEWS – JOHNNY LIAR RODE CHRISTINE TO VICTORY AGAIN LAST NIGHT. WHAT A BOY!

cropped-fotoflexer_photo54

giphy.gif