JEALOUS JOHN!

 

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Just when you thought ‘Johnny Liar’ Black would ride Christine all the way through the pearly gates, it appears that he’s a closet knob jockey.

Allegedly, on a recent undercover trip to Inverclyde to update the Bum Boys on his ‘Harry’ dossier,  the Clane Clouseau donned VAN BUMSHAFTEN’s kit to squeals of pleasure from PORKY PAUL Johnstone!

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Strapadictomy beckons!

Elsewhere, Police Scotland have swooped on a house in Wemyss Bay after an emaciated trussed body was discovered in the boot of a taxi.

Finally, having received complimentary tickets for Saturday’s match at Inverness, Mortonjag and LinwoodTON intend to catch up on a few old friends.

MORE SOON FOLKS.

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