Big Andy Morrison was in a bigger ‘cream puff’ even before the ‘Stars of ’79’ ‘kick-off’. Ground rules were being broken and he ‘actually expressed his concerns in a letter to the Trust’! Presumably said ‘Trust’ gave up after the ninth page!
Constable Goodwank’s polisman’s helmet was then treated to a joyous four finger boogie as Skinnymalinky put arch enemy Jim Gallacher ‘in his place’!
….and Tally Ho, Plod and Co. were off to the local ‘Cop Shop’ – perchance to catch a swatch at Juicy Janice of the disappearing bucket.
But the real Polis had fucked up. Dammit!
Never mind – Constable Goodwank had not sat idly by. Money HAD been stolen and with the benefit of his vast experience and a brand new Tesco notebook, he would soon nail the villain!
….ably assisted by St. Sean of that lethargic lecky meter who courageously exposed the culprit on Bawbag David Bell’s Comic!
Behold the confident clown words of Dunco, who took it upon himself to count invisible tenners in a tombola that wasn’t there. A prophetic final sentence perhaps?
And lying perjurer Dunco could barely contain his joy when ‘WHIZZ’ Robinson homed in on his poisoned chalice like a moth to a candle flame!
Meanwhile Nicky Boy’s subservient helper – wee Chris MaCockindale – made a promise. Dr. MaCockindale’s full written report must be due for publication any day soon.
The vastly experienced
solvent abuser insolvency practitioner was warming to the task too, and his full account is bound to be a cracker!
From the prosecution’s key witness!
….and as honest Sean of those dodgy digiboxes, had spotted Dunco’s piles, poor Jim Gallacher clearly didn’t stand a chance in court!
BUT – in a masterly stroke of risk management Slick Nick dredged up a Trust Deed he hadn’t bothered his bahookie checking for first time around, and a guaranteed £236.78 was MUCH more attractive than taking a chance on Dunco’s ‘cast iron’ case. Nothing arrogant about thinking the Trustee would do him a wee favour, eh! Might as well tell the ‘guys’ on the Trust forum that the case was ‘more or less over’.
The consummate professional was determined to assist his bean counting buddy.
And , just to be doubly sure!
‘HEY PRESTO’! Job done and dusted. Thank you Mr. Chairman.
QUELLE SURPRISE, WHEN FIDDLER FORSYTH FIXED IT FOR HIM.
BUT – ‘Jings, crivvens, help ma Boab’ ‘Dear Iain’ had forgotten all about the Monkey and Fing.
Don’t miss the next one folks when the TOADMEISTER writes to ‘Dear Iain’.